Our Generation and the Church

 A week or so ago I was sitting in the living room listening to my Dad and a friend discuss various topics including youth groups, church, and why young people are leaving the church. This last caught my attention the most, I think, as it has come up more than once in the last year. I agree with what they both said, one point being that many believe it’s largely caused by the church taking over the discipleship of the children and youth. I strongly agree with this! I was blessed to grow up in a family where family Bible reading is very important and, for the most part, a part of everyday life. But from what I have seen this isn’t how the majority of families live, even Christian families. For many of us the biggest Christian influence in life comes from church on Sunday and maybe Wednesday evening.  And at church everyone seems to go his or her own way. Babies to the nursery, children to various age-segregated classes and activities and parents to their own things. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with spending time with those of your own age. I’m all for people spending time with their peers, but I think there comes a point where the segregation has to stop. It has to! Why are young people leaving the church? Is it, perhaps, because our society has turned into a peer-based society?

As a young person myself I see it everywhere. Kids grow up and instead of listening to their parents, becoming close to their parents, and really being friends with their parents they seem to reject what their parents say in many cases and see their parents as the “bad guys.” The ones who want to keep them from having fun. The ones who want to control them, keep them down, keep them from fulfilling their dreams. In the place that their parents should have filled as counselors young people have their peers: the other young men and women who don’t have much more life experience or wisdom than they do. And so we force our parents and the other older, wise people in our lives to watch helplessly as we go down the same destructive paths that they went down, making the same mistakes as they did. Or worse: we look at the mistakes we’ve seen our parents make and, instead of truly learning from their mistakes, we throw out the baby with the bath water, so to speak. We see their faults, decide what we think the reason for their problems must be and turn our back on anything and everything they might hold important. They have no honor in our house, despite God’s commandment to “Honor thy father and thy mother that thy days may be long upon the earth which the Lord thy God giveth thee.” (Exodus 20:12)

No one is perfect: we all know that. But that’s no reason not to listen to our parents. Sure, you see their faults, even, perhaps, the ones you think they have but which are only imagined. You don’t see as many of your friends’ faults and the ones you do see you’re more willing to forgive. Why then, are we so unwilling to forgive our parents? The ones who ought to have the MOST grace in our eyes. 

 But it’s not just the parents who are being forsaken. So many times it seems like almost the entire older generation is being pushed aside. They have nothing for us to learn from. They’re old, they don’t know how life is now. I daresay they know a lot more than we might think. A lot more than we even imagine is possible!  And yet our generation has been raised to care only for ourselves and what we want. No longer do we care for, respect, and learn from those around us who are older and wiser than we are. There is an example of this in the Bible, in 1 Kings 12. Solomon had died leaving his kingdom to his son Rehoboam. The people came to Rehoboam asking him to lift some of the burden his father had placed upon them. The young king first turned to the men who had served as his father’s advisors and asked what to do. However instead of heeding their advice he went to his young friends and followed their counsel… thus confirming his loss of the vast majority of the kingdom. What makes us think we’ll have any better success than he did? 

 All through the Scriptures respect and honor for those older than us is emphasized and for good reason! 

  “ The hoary [gray] head is a crown of glory, if it be found in the way of righteousness.” (Provebs 16:31)

“Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honour the face of the old man, and fear thy God: I am the Lord.” (Leviticus 19:32)

                Why then do we forsake their wisdom? Why do we seek out the foolishness of our peers instead of going to the older men and women around us and hearing what they might say? If you’re a young person let me ask you a question: when was the last time you sat in a long conversation with anyone of the older generations? Society has changed so much over the last few decades, even since our parents were young, this is true. But is it true that nothing they have to say is relevant today? I don’t think so!

 I think if we had only listened to what our parents have to say, if they had listened to what their parents had to say, we would not be in the mess we’re in today. I don’t think anyone would deny that our society, our country, the Church in our country is in trouble. And why? I strongly believe it is because as each generation comes along we turn our backs on more and more of what our parents have to teach us.  With each generation we’ve drifted farther and farther from the truth until we’ve reached the point where droves of young men and women grow up in the church and then in the end forsake everything their parents hold dear. Everything their parents ever tried to teach them is thrown out. What will happen now? I don’t know. All I know is we are in deep trouble, especially if something drastic doesn’t happen, and soon!  The ultimate answer is to turn to Jesus Christ in true obedience and repentance. But I would say as well, turn to the older Christians God has placed in our lives.

A good author has a reason for every character in a story, no matter how small a part they play. In the same way there is a reason for everyone that comes into your life. You may not know that reason. You may never know that reason until the end when the entire picture is revealed. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a reason. I guess it’s up to us, in most cases, to take advantage of those people being within our reach. 

Photo courtesy of Angela Covington